Scream, Wilhelm, Scream!

A couple months ago, our dear friends Colin and Rachel asked if they could submit something to the blog. So as not to hurt their feelings we said, "yes". Who knew they would actually do it! This week's piece is by Colin, Rachel will get her shot next week. Though this isn't The Gong Show, we'd love to hear your thoughts on this little experiment either in the comments or on our Facebook page.

And without further ado, I give you what is easily the longest piece in Cinema Nerds/This Cinematic Life history...

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In the world of movies there are two constants: dorky-looking guys always seem to end up with girls jammed with more silicon and modifications than an upgraded PC, and everyone apparently has the same scream. Since 1951 over 130 films have given us the illusion that when anyone is shot, blown up, tossed over a railing, or taken down by a large aquatic lizard, it’s the same guy crying out in mock pain. Okay, so maybe it isn’t some incredibly wizened yet surprisingly well preserved thespian in all those rolls. With the permission of the Film Overlords, I’ve been asked to tell you all about a sixty-one year-old audio clip that unlike those associated with it, just won’t die. 

Close your eyes for a moment and imagine your favorite movie scene involving some elaborate and expensive action sequence. Do you hear that high-pitched scream in the back of your mind as people are scattered by a well-timed Bay-SPLOSION (that’s a Michael Bay-created explosion for all you kids and cadets out there)? Well unless you’re hearing impaired or you’ve never seen a movie (which, if you’re reading this blog I’d assume you’ve at least seen some form of moving-picture, but I might be wrong), then odds are, you’ve heard what has been affectionately named, the Wilhelm Scream. I know, you’re thinking to yourself, What does Kaiser Wilhelm have to do with screaming? Well, it is my sad duty to inform you that a particular mustachioed German leader in spiked helmet has nothing to do with this Wilhelm. 

When the scream was first used in the 1951 Gary Cooper film Distant Drums, it was given the instantly recognizable and very hip name, "man getting bit by an alligator, and he screams". It wasn’t until the 1953 western The Charge At Feather River that the scream was used again and given its official name, "the Wilhelm Scream" after a character named Wilhelm (ironic, right?) was heard to scream it as he took an arrow to the knee…or the upper thigh, I can’t quite recall. Since then, it’s been a constant in-joke among film sound engineers and mixers. Man, I’d love to attend their parties. 

In more recent cinematic history, the scream was given a second life when Ben Burtt, cinematic sound effects guru and the voices of R2-D2 and Wall-E, used it in the 1977 cult film Star Wars. If you’ve never seen this low budget and insanely obscure independent film, I highly suggest you track down a copy and watch it undubbed in its original language, Esperanto. Word is Criterion might put it out sometime in 2013 but I’m not going to hold my breath. After all, I’m still waiting patiently for them to release that 1995 gem, Showgirls!

But wait, there’s more! In addition to the silver screen, the scream has also had a life on the small screen. In 2008, the Wilhelm Scream was used in all twelve episodes of the ABC Family geek-fest The Middleman, based on a series published by Viper Comics. In a show already filled with more nerdy and obscure pop-culture references than the U.S. Government has deemed appropriate (Frank Herbert’s Dune, Ghostbusters, and classic Doctor Who to name a few), the addition of the Wilhelm Scream was just another layer on an already delicious and painfully low-rated cake. By the by, I shake my fist at the viewers of television back in 2008; why couldn’t you have supported something so cool and nerdy? Sure, I, myself never watched it when it was on ABC Family but at least I caught it on DVD thanks to Shout! Factory. Can the rest of you claim the same lame-ass excuse? Hmmm…? I put the blame squarely on you, kids and cadets. Ah, I see my endorsement checks have begun to arrive.

If you’ve read this much of the article only to say to yourself, What the hell is this guy going on about? I’ve never heard any sort of repetitive scream in all the hundreds of movies I’ve watched over the course of my time on this Earth, I could assume one of two things: either, being the pretentious hipster you are, you’ve only ever watched obscure art-house films about gay cowboys eating pudding, or you just need a simple reminder. You’ll thank me for this later, but for now simply enjoy 10+ min of pure Wilhelm-induced joy:

 

If that iconic scream hasn’t begun to haunt your every waking thought by now, then clearly I haven’t done my job properly. Thankfully, if you act quickly, professional Wilhelm Screamers will be rushed to your house or place of residence to make sure you never go another day without hearing that sound.

Much like any child of the 1970’s and/or 1980’s, I’ve grown up on that scream thanks in no small part to two men, a Jew and a Gentile by the names of Spielberg and Lucas. Those guys’ films alone account for over a dozen uses of the scream in cinema. But let’s be honest, I don’t think I’ve heard that instantly recognizable cry enough in my lifetime. I want to hear it everywhere. I want to see a commercial for diapers and have a baby turn and look at the camera and give that scream as it makes a dookie in its diaper. I want more rappers to sample it; I’m looking at you Kanye West. I will not rest until every man, woman, child, and sea-sponge is fully aware of and constantly using the Wilhelm Scream in their daily lives; that’s not a threat mind you, it’s a promise. But I digress.

Hopefully, gentle reader, you will walk away from this article (or at the least crawl away) with a better understanding of a cinematic sound staple. If you would like to learn more about the Wilhelm Scream or would like to contribute to a local charity involved in raising awareness of the scream, please send me a check or money order made out to ‘Cash’ or write to your congressional representatives.

Now then, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a gorge to throw myself into as I escape a hail of bullets and a massive explosion. Thankfully I’ve uncovered the perfect sound effect to accompany me as I dive to my bullet-riddled and fiery death in front of the camera and, a cheering theater-going audience. Until next time kids and cadets, keep watching the screen.

-Colin

(the Devourer of Worlds)